1
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[adult Sheldon] Previously on
Young Sheldon...

2
00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:04,880
[Dr. Linkletter]
Hello, Mrs. Cooper.

3
00:00:04,881 --> 00:00:07,717
I just want to let you know,
with Dr. Sturgis away,

4
00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:10,270
I'll be available
should Sheldon need anything.

5
00:00:10,271 --> 00:00:13,305
Now, I'm not terribly
experienced around children.

6
00:00:13,306 --> 00:00:16,616
If he needs to use the restroom,
I don't have to go in with him, do I?

7
00:00:17,310 --> 00:00:18,853
I don't need you to babysit me.

8
00:00:18,937 --> 00:00:20,480
I'm perfectly self-reliant.

9
00:00:20,481 --> 00:00:22,981
Then it's good I kept the receipt
for this bottle of bubbles

10
00:00:22,982 --> 00:00:24,150
shaped like a bear.

11
00:00:25,109 --> 00:00:27,278
Welcome to the world of philosophy.

12
00:00:27,362 --> 00:00:28,738
I'm going to teach you

13
00:00:28,821 --> 00:00:31,366
that you don't even know
what you think you know.

14
00:00:32,075 --> 00:00:33,284
Oh, boy.

15
00:00:33,368 --> 00:00:34,994
I'm not going to school.

16
00:00:34,995 --> 00:00:35,994
Why not?

17
00:00:35,995 --> 00:00:37,615
Because I don't know what's real.

18
00:00:38,581 --> 00:00:39,999
Nothing matters.

19
00:00:40,875 --> 00:00:41,925
George?

20
00:00:46,881 --> 00:00:48,621
All right. What's the problem here?

21
00:00:48,675 --> 00:00:50,218
I don't know what's real.

22
00:00:50,219 --> 00:00:52,344
Well, it's a fun thing to think about
on the way to school.

23
00:00:52,345 --> 00:00:53,425
Get up and get dressed.

24
00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:55,056
Maybe I'm already dressed.

25
00:00:55,139 --> 00:00:57,475
Maybe I'm wearing a zoot suit and spats.

26
00:00:57,476 --> 00:01:00,852
That's a shoe covering
that's short for spatterdasher.

27
00:01:00,853 --> 00:01:02,105
Or is it?

28
00:01:02,188 --> 00:01:03,314
There's no way to know.

29
00:01:03,315 --> 00:01:05,649
Here's what I know.
I don't have time for this nonsense.

30
00:01:05,650 --> 00:01:06,850
[Sheldon] What is time?

31
00:01:06,859 --> 00:01:08,945
What is sense? What is "is"?

32
00:01:09,445 --> 00:01:10,822
Sheldon, I mean it.

33
00:01:10,905 --> 00:01:12,705
I remember when things meant things.

34
00:01:12,706 --> 00:01:15,409
All right, I'm gonna count to three.
One...

35
00:01:15,410 --> 00:01:17,537
Believing in numbers,
that takes me back.

36
00:01:18,246 --> 00:01:20,081
- Two.
- "To be or not to be."

37
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Shakespeare was onto something.

38
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This is your last chance.

39
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Have you ever wondered
if you're the tongue

40
00:01:25,712 --> 00:01:27,796
of a multidimensional being,
trying to taste something

41
00:01:27,797 --> 00:01:29,424
you can never even understand?

42
00:01:30,466 --> 00:01:31,516
I have.

43
00:01:36,389 --> 00:01:37,807
I talked to him.

44
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Where is your mother?

45
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She had to leave for work.

46
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I have to work, too.

47
00:01:43,104 --> 00:01:44,897
You also get to take me to school.

48
00:01:44,898 --> 00:01:46,982
What am I supposed to do
about your brother?

49
00:01:46,983 --> 00:01:49,444
Call me old-fashioned,
but I say spank him.

50
00:01:50,194 --> 00:01:51,279
Your mom won't let me.

51
00:01:52,363 --> 00:01:54,365
[theme song playing]

52
00:02:10,757 --> 00:02:13,760
Okay, I'm here. What's up?

53
00:02:13,761 --> 00:02:15,719
Sheldon won't get out of bed

54
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and I'm gonna be late for work,
he's going to be late for school.

55
00:02:17,555 --> 00:02:19,849
So you want me
to get him up and drive him?

56
00:02:19,932 --> 00:02:20,982
Yeah.

57
00:02:21,559 --> 00:02:24,329
I like it better when I just
come eat your food and leave.

58
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Hey, Moonpie. What's going on here?

59
00:02:29,025 --> 00:02:30,568
That's an excellent question.

60
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Too bad there's no answer.

61
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Well, you need to get out of bed.

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I don't need to do anything.

63
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Okay. I'm gonna count to three.

64
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Dad already counted to three.

65
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Oh.

66
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Did he try the Texas thing?

67
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No.

68
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In that case...

69
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Look at you lying there.

70
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When a Texan gets knocked off a horse,
he gets right back on.

71
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That is the second most important thing
about being a Texan,

72
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right after thinking
you're better than everybody else.

73
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Maybe the horse gets back on the Texan.
Who's to say?

74
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I don't know what that means.

75
00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:07,500
That's because you can't know anything.

76
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If you need to stare at the ceiling

77
00:03:11,234 --> 00:03:13,318
and contemplate the futility
of existence,

78
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Missy's bed is available.

79
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Amazing.

80
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What is?

81
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I've been using the same pen
for seven months

82
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and it's still going.

83
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That's your bar for amazing?

84
00:03:26,207 --> 00:03:27,257
Yep.

85
00:03:28,292 --> 00:03:29,627
Sad.

86
00:03:29,711 --> 00:03:30,761
It's the same pen.

87
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- [telephone ringing]
- It is too early in the morning for you.

88
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Hello.

89
00:03:36,884 --> 00:03:38,144
Yeah, I'll be down in a bit.

90
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Where are you headed?

91
00:03:42,348 --> 00:03:43,433
Principal's office.

92
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Ooh, you're in trouble.

93
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You're a child.

94
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[laughs] I'd rather be a child
than in trouble.

95
00:03:51,190 --> 00:03:54,485
Shelly, Dr. Sturgis
is on the line for you.

96
00:03:55,403 --> 00:03:57,780
Maybe he is, maybe he isn't,
but very well.

97
00:03:58,322 --> 00:03:59,866
- Hello?
- Hi, Sheldon.

98
00:03:59,949 --> 00:04:03,578
I hear you're going through
some sort of existential crisis.

99
00:04:03,661 --> 00:04:05,037
I suppose so.

100
00:04:05,038 --> 00:04:07,581
I just don't know
if we can tell what's real or not,

101
00:04:07,582 --> 00:04:08,791
and if nothing's real,

102
00:04:08,875 --> 00:04:11,645
I don't know what to think
or if I'm even thinking at all.

103
00:04:12,003 --> 00:04:14,172
I went through something similar once.

104
00:04:15,089 --> 00:04:16,466
Really? What happened?

105
00:04:17,049 --> 00:04:21,763
I was trekking through the Amazon
and I saw two frogs,

106
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one hallucinogenic and the other not.

107
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[chuckles] I tried
to lick the normal one,

108
00:04:29,729 --> 00:04:33,232
and by mistake,
I licked the hallucinogenic one.

109
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It really rocked my world.

110
00:04:36,486 --> 00:04:38,404
Why would you lick either of them?

111
00:04:39,155 --> 00:04:41,657
I'm not sure. Probably low blood sugar.

112
00:04:41,741 --> 00:04:45,787
But the point is,
I also lost track of reality.

113
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How did you handle it?

114
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I saw a jaguar and I realized

115
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I didn't care if it was real or not.

116
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I just hauled my tushy out of there.

117
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I appreciate the call.

118
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I'm giving you back to my Meemaw now.

119
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Bye.

120
00:05:05,264 --> 00:05:07,433
Hey, John. Any luck?

121
00:05:07,517 --> 00:05:10,144
Not unless you have access
to a jaguar.

122
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I don't think I do.

123
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Really, any jungle cat will do.

124
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Hey, Tom.

125
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George.

126
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Sheldon's not here anymore.
Thought it'd be a while

127
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before I got called back
into the principal's office.

128
00:05:22,865 --> 00:05:24,575
How's he doing? I miss that kid.

129
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He took a philosophy class
and won't get out of bed

130
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'cause he doesn't know
what's real anymore.

131
00:05:30,248 --> 00:05:31,298
Anyway,

132
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we need to talk about Georgie.

133
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Should have seen that coming.

134
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What's wrong?

135
00:05:36,754 --> 00:05:38,923
Well, he's been cutting classes.

136
00:05:39,006 --> 00:05:41,217
Already? Semester's barely started.

137
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He's a go-getter.

138
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Mmm.

139
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- I'll talk to him.
- Thanks.

140
00:05:48,432 --> 00:05:50,662
How are the team
looking this year, George?

141
00:05:50,663 --> 00:05:53,353
We just had
one difficult conversation, Tom.

142
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Let's not have another.

143
00:05:55,314 --> 00:05:56,364
Smart.

144
00:05:56,566 --> 00:06:00,056
[adult Sheldon] While my Meemaw
wasn't able to acquire a jungle cat,

145
00:06:00,278 --> 00:06:03,823
the idea of tormenting a child
did tickle her Texan fancy.

146
00:06:03,906 --> 00:06:04,991
Sheldon.

147
00:06:08,661 --> 00:06:11,706
I have someone else
who wants to talk to you.

148
00:06:11,707 --> 00:06:13,582
What are you doing
with that filthy thing?

149
00:06:13,583 --> 00:06:14,876
Why do you care?

150
00:06:14,959 --> 00:06:16,335
If nothing is real,

151
00:06:16,878 --> 00:06:18,296
then neither is the chicken.

152
00:06:21,215 --> 00:06:24,510
Oh, good. We're standing now.
That's progress.

153
00:06:25,011 --> 00:06:26,137
Get her out of here.

154
00:06:26,220 --> 00:06:27,889
Well, I would, but...

155
00:06:27,890 --> 00:06:29,431
[chuckles]

156
00:06:29,432 --> 00:06:32,728
Apparently,
I can't know what here is.

157
00:06:33,227 --> 00:06:35,897
So maybe I could just
set her on your bed.

158
00:06:35,980 --> 00:06:38,566
Okay, okay. I'll get dressed.

159
00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:39,775
Make it snappy.

160
00:06:41,193 --> 00:06:43,663
This still doesn't solve
my existential crisis.

161
00:06:43,738 --> 00:06:45,364
Say what? You wanna hold her?

162
00:06:46,157 --> 00:06:47,207
No.

163
00:06:47,658 --> 00:06:50,202
Less talk. More pants.

164
00:07:00,379 --> 00:07:01,639
What's your first class?

165
00:07:01,714 --> 00:07:03,841
Solid-state physics at 11:30.

166
00:07:04,550 --> 00:07:06,594
- You'll make it just in time.
- Although...

167
00:07:06,677 --> 00:07:10,848
And before you say
"Does time even exist?" it does.

168
00:07:11,390 --> 00:07:12,892
So stop wasting mine.

169
00:07:14,899 --> 00:07:18,605
What's this philosophy teacher's name?

170
00:07:18,606 --> 00:07:20,566
Professor Ericson. Why?

171
00:07:20,650 --> 00:07:22,610
I might pop in and say hello.

172
00:07:23,069 --> 00:07:24,119
Be careful.

173
00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:26,947
She may make you question
your most deeply held values.

174
00:07:26,948 --> 00:07:28,532
I'm a stubborn old crank.

175
00:07:29,367 --> 00:07:30,618
I'll do just fine.

176
00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:33,171
I'm a stubborn young crank,
and it didn't help me.

177
00:07:36,791 --> 00:07:38,042
You wanted to see me?

178
00:07:39,418 --> 00:07:40,468
Sit down.

179
00:07:41,087 --> 00:07:43,377
Is this gonna take long?
I need to get to class.

180
00:07:43,378 --> 00:07:45,215
From what I hear,
you don't care about that.

181
00:07:45,216 --> 00:07:46,266
Now sit.

182
00:07:51,764 --> 00:07:52,964
What the hell you doin'?

183
00:07:53,724 --> 00:07:55,142
I cut a class. Who cares?

184
00:07:55,226 --> 00:07:57,228
It was more than one, and I care.

185
00:07:57,229 --> 00:08:00,480
You start flunking out,
you're gonna get kicked off the team.

186
00:08:00,481 --> 00:08:01,691
Fine.

187
00:08:01,692 --> 00:08:04,067
Well, now you don't care about football?

188
00:08:04,068 --> 00:08:05,361
Not really.

189
00:08:05,362 --> 00:08:08,113
I don't know what's going on with you,

190
00:08:08,114 --> 00:08:09,864
but you better
get your head out of your ass.

191
00:08:09,865 --> 00:08:11,450
Football's a waste of time.

192
00:08:11,575 --> 00:08:12,952
I have a job I could be at.

193
00:08:13,035 --> 00:08:15,985
You made a commitment to the team
and you're gonna honor it.

194
00:08:18,290 --> 00:08:19,340
Are we done?

195
00:08:21,752 --> 00:08:22,962
Just get back to class.

196
00:08:24,114 --> 00:08:27,090
And I better see you at practice.

197
00:08:27,091 --> 00:08:29,801
Well, I don't know if I can find it
with my head up my ass.

198
00:08:31,241 --> 00:08:34,014
So, according to de Broglie,

199
00:08:34,015 --> 00:08:36,305
lambda equals "h"
divided by "m" times what?

200
00:08:36,306 --> 00:08:38,059
Sheldon?

201
00:08:38,060 --> 00:08:39,396
Is it velocity?

202
00:08:39,478 --> 00:08:40,563
Yes. Now...

203
00:08:40,646 --> 00:08:41,846
Or is it a velociraptor?

204
00:08:42,231 --> 00:08:43,281
I'm sorry?

205
00:08:43,357 --> 00:08:47,153
Perhaps lambda equals "h" divided
by "m" times a velociraptor.

206
00:08:48,154 --> 00:08:49,530
Or a velveteen rabbit.

207
00:08:49,613 --> 00:08:50,865
Ooh! Or Velveeta.

208
00:08:50,990 --> 00:08:54,240
That's the cheese my mom puts
on broccoli when she's being fancy.

209
00:08:55,244 --> 00:08:57,044
Is this from your philosophy class?

210
00:08:57,045 --> 00:08:59,539
Or perhaps that Ren and Stumpy
I've heard about.

211
00:08:59,540 --> 00:09:00,791
Philosophy.

212
00:09:02,043 --> 00:09:03,919
Mr. Cooper, do you really believe

213
00:09:03,920 --> 00:09:06,796
that de Broglie's equation
contains Velveeta cheese?

214
00:09:06,797 --> 00:09:09,507
Well, I don't know.
Maybe he was just trying to be fancy.

215
00:09:10,426 --> 00:09:11,476
Hello.

216
00:09:11,844 --> 00:09:12,970
Can I help you?

217
00:09:13,054 --> 00:09:14,764
Hi. I'm Connie Tucker.

218
00:09:14,847 --> 00:09:16,587
I'm Sheldon Cooper's grandmother.

219
00:09:16,891 --> 00:09:19,310
Oh! Nice to meet you.

220
00:09:19,894 --> 00:09:21,562
He is a remarkable young man.

221
00:09:21,645 --> 00:09:22,897
Yes, he is.

222
00:09:23,022 --> 00:09:25,399
He's also a very
impressionable young man,

223
00:09:25,524 --> 00:09:28,027
kind of like a lump of clay
with a bowtie.

224
00:09:29,195 --> 00:09:31,447
All I did was teach him
about epistemology.

225
00:09:31,530 --> 00:09:36,243
Whatever it is you're teaching him,
it has made him question everything.

226
00:09:36,327 --> 00:09:37,536
That's the goal.

227
00:09:38,079 --> 00:09:41,707
Lady, I had to threaten him with
a chicken so he'd put his pants on.

228
00:09:41,791 --> 00:09:44,141
Well, I don't know
what's gotten into that kid.

229
00:09:44,142 --> 00:09:46,252
He's allowed to not
want to play football.

230
00:09:46,253 --> 00:09:49,298
Can you, for once in your life,
take my side, Wayne?

231
00:09:49,381 --> 00:09:51,181
It's not my fault you're never right.

232
00:09:52,384 --> 00:09:54,124
So you think it's okay he just quit?

233
00:09:54,136 --> 00:09:55,996
He doesn't get that much playing time.

234
00:09:57,515 --> 00:09:59,225
Well, in my family, we don't quit.

235
00:09:59,558 --> 00:10:00,893
I don't know.

236
00:10:00,894 --> 00:10:02,560
You quit my book club pretty quick.

237
00:10:02,561 --> 00:10:04,063
I'm talking about football.

238
00:10:04,396 --> 00:10:06,506
Why is it so important to you
that he play?

239
00:10:07,149 --> 00:10:08,529
Are you sure you're a coach?

240
00:10:09,401 --> 00:10:13,239
Team sports provides confidence,
leadership, discipline.

241
00:10:13,322 --> 00:10:16,117
So does holding down a job,
which he seems to shine at.

242
00:10:17,743 --> 00:10:19,370
Let's just eat in silence.

243
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,337
Fine.

244
00:10:22,161 --> 00:10:27,085
I still think you should have read
The Color Purple.

245
00:10:27,086 --> 00:10:28,136
We were bawling.

246
00:10:28,137 --> 00:10:32,465
Although tasty,
a brick of cheese is not a number.

247
00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:34,760
Why are we still talking about this?

248
00:10:34,844 --> 00:10:36,428
Maybe we're not talking at all.

249
00:10:37,096 --> 00:10:38,596
Okay, that's enough for today.

250
00:10:39,723 --> 00:10:40,891
Not your best lecture.

251
00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:44,562
It's fairly normal
for first-time philosophy students

252
00:10:44,645 --> 00:10:46,272
to have their world views shaken.

253
00:10:46,355 --> 00:10:47,898
Do they snap out of it?

254
00:10:48,732 --> 00:10:49,782
Well, you hope.

255
00:10:50,609 --> 00:10:52,611
Professor Ericson, I insist that...

256
00:10:53,112 --> 00:10:55,406
Hello, Connie.
What a pleasant surprise.

257
00:10:55,489 --> 00:10:56,657
Hey.

258
00:10:56,658 --> 00:10:59,492
I'm sorry you're about to see me
speak harshly to my colleague.

259
00:10:59,493 --> 00:11:00,451
Have at it.

260
00:11:00,452 --> 00:11:02,954
Professor Ericson, I insist
that you speak to this young man

261
00:11:02,955 --> 00:11:04,957
and explain to him
that reality is real

262
00:11:05,082 --> 00:11:07,209
and it's possible to know
things as fact.

263
00:11:07,293 --> 00:11:10,045
The class is called
Introduction to Philosophy.

264
00:11:10,129 --> 00:11:11,179
That's what I did.

265
00:11:11,213 --> 00:11:13,132
Well, un-introduce him.

266
00:11:13,133 --> 00:11:15,758
Yes. He's at this school
'cause of his brilliant scientific mind.

267
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:18,529
He spent my last class
talking about processed cheese.

268
00:11:18,554 --> 00:11:19,847
Sheldon, is that true?

269
00:11:19,930 --> 00:11:21,140
Nothing's true.

270
00:11:21,807 --> 00:11:23,727
You see what you've done? You broke him.

271
00:11:26,395 --> 00:11:27,445
Hey.

272
00:11:27,446 --> 00:11:32,150
How come you didn't want
to get out of bed this morning?

273
00:11:32,151 --> 00:11:34,945
If I can't know what's real,
what's the point?

274
00:11:35,905 --> 00:11:37,656
You have the right words.

275
00:11:37,865 --> 00:11:39,365
You're just saying them wrong.

276
00:11:40,242 --> 00:11:42,203
It's not "What's the point?"

277
00:11:43,037 --> 00:11:44,297
It's "What's the point?"

278
00:11:45,706 --> 00:11:47,082
I don't understand.

279
00:11:47,166 --> 00:11:49,835
Asking these questions is exciting.

280
00:11:50,586 --> 00:11:51,906
It's what gets me out of bed.

281
00:11:53,505 --> 00:11:54,555
That's interesting.

282
00:11:54,556 --> 00:11:57,967
Richard Feynman did say
the greatest joy in life

283
00:11:57,968 --> 00:11:59,887
is the pleasure of finding things out.

284
00:12:00,387 --> 00:12:02,514
Feynman, he's the physics guy, right?

285
00:12:02,598 --> 00:12:05,142
Yes. And your perfume is beguiling.

286
00:12:06,644 --> 00:12:08,312
It's all making sense to me now.

287
00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:09,779
Thank you.

288
00:12:10,356 --> 00:12:11,649
I am happy to help.

289
00:12:11,732 --> 00:12:15,642
Dr. Linkletter, I'm dropping your class
and switching my major to philosophy.

290
00:12:16,362 --> 00:12:17,412
What?

291
00:12:24,787 --> 00:12:25,867
[Sheldon] It's funny.

292
00:12:25,868 --> 00:12:27,247
This morning I couldn't get out of bed

293
00:12:27,248 --> 00:12:30,138
and now I stand before a whole
new exciting field of study.

294
00:12:31,168 --> 00:12:35,089
Maybe instead of making this big switch,
you could study both.

295
00:12:35,172 --> 00:12:38,175
You could be physics-philosophy guy.

296
00:12:38,259 --> 00:12:40,261
You sound like a logical positivist.

297
00:12:40,262 --> 00:12:42,095
That's a branch of philosophy
that maintains

298
00:12:42,096 --> 00:12:44,180
the best way to philosophize
is through science.

299
00:12:44,181 --> 00:12:45,231
Well, there you go.

300
00:12:45,266 --> 00:12:46,316
Do that.

301
00:12:47,017 --> 00:12:48,637
It may be too early to specialize.

302
00:12:48,644 --> 00:12:50,980
I've only been a philosopher
for 15 minutes.

303
00:12:52,189 --> 00:12:53,239
Did you notice

304
00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:56,693
Dr. Linkletter didn't look
too thrilled about you leaving science?

305
00:12:56,694 --> 00:12:58,319
He never looks thrilled about anything.

306
00:12:58,320 --> 00:12:59,905
I think that's just his face.

307
00:13:01,198 --> 00:13:02,248
That's the face.

308
00:13:07,055 --> 00:13:10,248
Why the hell weren't you at practice?

309
00:13:10,249 --> 00:13:11,869
Can't talk right now. I'm working.

310
00:13:12,001 --> 00:13:13,621
Well, you're gonna talk about it.

311
00:13:14,962 --> 00:13:16,162
What do you want from me?

312
00:13:16,422 --> 00:13:18,472
I don't wanna play football.
I wanna work.

313
00:13:19,550 --> 00:13:21,660
You have your whole life
to hold down a job.

314
00:13:21,677 --> 00:13:23,262
Hey, I like my job.

315
00:13:23,345 --> 00:13:25,222
It's not my problem you hate yours.

316
00:13:31,312 --> 00:13:32,604
Do whatever you want.

317
00:13:32,605 --> 00:13:37,525
[adult Sheldon] To figure out which
school of philosophy suited me best,

318
00:13:37,526 --> 00:13:39,570
I decided to sample each one.

319
00:13:40,070 --> 00:13:42,948
The same way I determined
my favorite flavor of oatmeal.

320
00:13:43,282 --> 00:13:44,332
Plain.

321
00:13:48,162 --> 00:13:49,246
What are you doing?

322
00:13:49,247 --> 00:13:51,914
I'm practicing
the philosophy of cynicism.

323
00:13:51,915 --> 00:13:55,285
The ancient Greek view that
the rules of society should be ignored.

324
00:13:55,286 --> 00:13:58,254
If you're gonna break rules,
you can do better than that.

325
00:13:58,255 --> 00:13:59,305
How?

326
00:13:59,923 --> 00:14:00,973
[yelps]

327
00:14:00,974 --> 00:14:04,052
[adult Sheldon]
Renaissance humanism is finding meaning

328
00:14:04,053 --> 00:14:06,138
in the human form through art.

329
00:14:07,014 --> 00:14:08,766
- Can I move?
- No.

330
00:14:08,849 --> 00:14:10,309
But my butt itches.

331
00:14:10,392 --> 00:14:11,852
Scratch it on your own time.

332
00:14:12,224 --> 00:14:18,358
[adult Sheldon] Nihilists believe that
there's no point to anything

333
00:14:18,359 --> 00:14:20,110
because it all ends in nothingness.

334
00:14:20,194 --> 00:14:21,653
Mind if I put on MTV?

335
00:14:21,654 --> 00:14:24,113
Doesn't matter.
We're all going to die anyway.

336
00:14:24,114 --> 00:14:25,741
Deep thought, dingus.

337
00:14:25,742 --> 00:14:28,701
[adult Sheldon]
Traditionalism is the philosophy

338
00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:31,052
that the best way of life
is a return to the past.

339
00:14:31,497 --> 00:14:32,706
What are you doing?

340
00:14:32,790 --> 00:14:36,043
Making my own butter...
like in olden times.

341
00:14:36,502 --> 00:14:37,711
That's stupid.

342
00:14:38,962 --> 00:14:40,882
[adult Sheldon] My arms are still sore.

343
00:14:41,632 --> 00:14:44,343
Altruism is the belief that
we should live only

344
00:14:44,426 --> 00:14:46,136
by bringing happiness to others.

345
00:14:46,137 --> 00:14:47,595
These are for you.

346
00:14:47,596 --> 00:14:48,646
Thanks.

347
00:14:49,014 --> 00:14:50,265
What the hell?

348
00:14:50,266 --> 00:14:53,184
[adult Sheldon]
Egoism is the belief that we should live

349
00:14:53,185 --> 00:14:55,225
only by bringing happiness to ourselves.

350
00:14:55,729 --> 00:14:56,814
They're pretty good.

351
00:14:56,815 --> 00:14:59,816
[adult Sheldon]
Transcendentalists were philosophers

352
00:14:59,817 --> 00:15:02,986
who believed that our deepest connection
is with nature.

353
00:15:04,571 --> 00:15:05,621
Meh.

354
00:15:12,496 --> 00:15:13,789
I'm beautiful.

355
00:15:16,667 --> 00:15:18,897
And then Georgie accuses me
of hating my job.

356
00:15:18,898 --> 00:15:21,295
Is this where I thought I'd end up?

357
00:15:21,296 --> 00:15:22,346
No.

358
00:15:22,347 --> 00:15:24,048
Is this where you thought you'd end up?

359
00:15:24,049 --> 00:15:26,467
I thought I'd be working
in my father's funeral home,

360
00:15:26,468 --> 00:15:27,970
sewing people's eyes shut.

361
00:15:28,053 --> 00:15:29,346
My life turned out great.

362
00:15:29,847 --> 00:15:31,056
Well, good for you.

363
00:15:33,183 --> 00:15:35,103
Worst part is, I think Georgie's right.

364
00:15:36,095 --> 00:15:38,521
You're not happy at work?

365
00:15:38,522 --> 00:15:40,232
I could see if my dad's hiring.

366
00:15:40,607 --> 00:15:41,987
How are your sewing skills?

367
00:15:42,401 --> 00:15:43,694
It's not work.

368
00:15:45,237 --> 00:15:46,287
[sighs]

369
00:15:46,363 --> 00:15:48,653
Honestly, I don't know
if I'm happy anywhere.

370
00:15:51,452 --> 00:15:52,502
Gosh.

371
00:15:52,503 --> 00:15:54,745
When I asked y'all to hang for a drink,

372
00:15:54,746 --> 00:15:56,976
I didn't know
you were gonna be such a bummer.

373
00:16:00,085 --> 00:16:01,135
Jeez Louise.

374
00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:14,690
[knocking on door]

375
00:16:15,142 --> 00:16:16,192
Dr. Linkletter.

376
00:16:16,226 --> 00:16:17,895
Sheldon, good to see you.

377
00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:19,028
Come on in.

378
00:16:19,029 --> 00:16:21,814
I don't suppose you're here
to discuss physics, are you?

379
00:16:21,815 --> 00:16:22,955
As a matter of fact, I am.

380
00:16:23,025 --> 00:16:24,109
Excellent.

381
00:16:24,193 --> 00:16:26,945
I'm here to drop your class.
I just need you to sign this.

382
00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:29,747
Have a seat.

383
00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:33,494
Sheldon, I don't know
if you've thought this through,

384
00:16:33,495 --> 00:16:35,036
but you're here on a
physics scholarship,

385
00:16:35,037 --> 00:16:38,290
and switching to philosophy
may not be well-received.

386
00:16:38,291 --> 00:16:41,459
Ordinarily, I'd be concerned,
but I'm currently embracing hedonism.

387
00:16:41,460 --> 00:16:43,837
Sheldon, I've been made
responsible for you.

388
00:16:43,838 --> 00:16:45,588
And so far, it's not going very well.

389
00:16:45,589 --> 00:16:48,382
You were admitted to this university
for your scientific acumen

390
00:16:48,383 --> 00:16:51,213
and changing majors
could have serious repercussions.

391
00:16:52,429 --> 00:16:54,056
Son, please try to understand.

392
00:16:54,139 --> 00:16:56,119
If you abandon physics for philosophy,

393
00:16:56,120 --> 00:16:57,767
you're gonna be missing out

394
00:16:57,768 --> 00:17:00,238
on the opportunity
to be part of something great.

395
00:17:00,239 --> 00:17:03,064
[adult Sheldon]
As Dr. Linkletter prattled on,

396
00:17:03,065 --> 00:17:06,777
I couldn't help but notice
the beauty of that ephemeral bubble.

397
00:17:07,110 --> 00:17:09,780
I wondered if perhaps
we're all just bubbles

398
00:17:10,239 --> 00:17:12,908
being buffeted through life
on a stream of currents

399
00:17:13,075 --> 00:17:14,826
beyond our understanding.

400
00:17:14,827 --> 00:17:15,952
Look at it.

401
00:17:15,953 --> 00:17:19,164
The local minimization
achieves a global maximization

402
00:17:19,248 --> 00:17:20,541
and it's nearly perfect.

403
00:17:20,624 --> 00:17:22,459
I wondered if this was the key

404
00:17:22,543 --> 00:17:24,773
to the smoothness
of matter in the universe.

405
00:17:25,128 --> 00:17:28,549
The cosmic web of stars and galaxies
could hold it together

406
00:17:28,632 --> 00:17:30,926
like the web of polymers in soap.

407
00:17:31,009 --> 00:17:33,119
This could be
a whole new area of research.

408
00:17:34,304 --> 00:17:36,640
Changing majors would be a huge mistake.

409
00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:38,445
But if this is what you really want...

410
00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:40,769
here you go.

411
00:17:43,272 --> 00:17:44,690
- Sheldon.
- What?

412
00:17:44,940 --> 00:17:45,990
Here you go.

413
00:17:46,024 --> 00:17:47,401
Good luck with philosophy.

414
00:17:47,734 --> 00:17:49,904
Oh, I'm back on science now.
I have work to do.

415
00:17:59,371 --> 00:18:01,373
[theme music playing]

416
00:18:01,423 --> 00:18:05,973
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